


My Criminal

by WhatTheShip



Category: Phan
Genre: AU where Dan's a criminal, M/M, Phan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-16
Updated: 2016-07-16
Packaged: 2018-07-24 09:42:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7503468
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhatTheShip/pseuds/WhatTheShip
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He never expected this to happen, how could it happen to him</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Criminal

In the beginning, I probably should've known that you would eventually leave me. I guess I chose not to think about the pain of losing you. You were everything. You gave me the hope to keep moving on, you taught me that just because someone might have a bad reputation doesn't mean they're a bad person.

I knew I loved you. I still love you, but I was always to afraid to admit that to you. I knew that once I said something you'd get scared and run away. I didn't want that. I wanted you in my life. I need you in my life. The white lights and the loud banging was enough to wake me, to let me know that you were going and there's nothing I could do to stop that.

You were being dragged away taken from me in the pitch darkness of the early mornings. Screams were blocked out by my tears and initial shock because of the fact that wow, this could happen to me. I sat on the floor hoping that this was all just a dream, desperately trying to wake myself from this horrid world. 

  I wanted to go back to when things were better, when everything was fine, when I hid my love from Dan, and when he pretended not to notice the longing stares I'd send towards him. I don't know how long I was sitting there listening to the CD of piano playing-Dan's playing stuck on repeat. I want to go back. I want to try and prevent this from happening. Hearing the phone ringing woke me from my form, slowly making my way towards the bedside table I picked it up without checking the ID.  

_"I love you, please don't wait for me move on. I'm not worth it, Phil, you deserve better."_ the line went dead after that, and that is when I knew. I was far to deep. 

  People always asked if I regretted meeting him. I told everyone the same thing. You can't regret everything you do, and in the end I would sill make the same mistakes if I get to live them with him." They'd look at me like I was deranged. I wasn't. I knew what I was getting myself into, but I guess if I knew what was to come, then I'd eventually drive myself insane with all the paranoid thoughts of "is today the day?" In the end, I did go mad. 

  Today was the day, and me, being foolish, wasn't prepared for it. I should've listened when they all told me to stay away. I remember the day he met my mum. She looked him up and down and decided then and there that he wasn't good for me. I remember telling her to never talk to me again. I'm left in the aftermath, wishing I had listened to her. She told me to stay away, that he could never love me with such a tainted heart. I never listened. I ran away with him. I was never ashamed of Dan; I never cared what others thought of me. I held his hand proud (when he let me, of course). He may have looked obscene, vulgar, corrupted, but it was all an act. Under everything, he's perfect. At least, to me he is. 

  His dark composure contrasted well with my bright and bubbly personality, he was never one for social gathering and hated to leave the house unless I was accompanying him. Picking myself up from my lowest point, I went downstairs to lock the entryway. I made my way back to the stairs and I pushed myself into the bedroom.

Dan's piano playing lingered through the room still. I felt the tears fall and I lost it. I picked up my phone and threw it against the wall. I took the lamp and smash it on the ground, glass clattering below my feet. The bed became unrecognizable. I scream, enraged by my inability to help. None of this should have happened. I shouldn't be here in this mess. Left in the aftermath of your hurricane, I guess the storm was too harsh to handle for me.

**Author's Note:**

> wow I had written this a long time ago and its not going to be updated frequently but I'll still work on itc:


End file.
